iphone 3GS does not show up in itunes, drivers do load to pc, slowly

[singingruby]

I received my new iphone for My Birthday this week. Greatly anticipated it, ATT customer, have used a Palm Treo since 2003, Treo 680 most recent. Would have gotton Pre but did not want Sprint. Need help, yesterday followed directions on apple site, searched Microsoift, I spent 2 hours on phone with 800 apple and 3 HOURS IN APPLE store to no avail. IBM, Z61t, vista Business sp2. My ipod nano 3rd gen works fine. The store exchanged the phone also because it did not vibrte. Palm software is on computer. Norton Security. I am not singing happy.