Well, it looks like I am going to be single again...

Hawk · 06-30-2009, 09:05 AM

Yeah... This sucks, but at this point inevitable. I can want to work it out till the cows come home, but if she's not willing, than the effort is wasted.
Some of you know what's been going on from my Tweets, most of you don't.
The wife and I have hit a wall in the relationship. By my point of view, she has changed as a person to a degree that I don't recognize her as the woman I married. I wanted to get counseling and try to fix it, but she has been determined to end this relationship for a while now, and yesterday, she finally said it's over. As sad as this all is, I am no longer going to waste time on someone that does not want to be with me.

This weekend, I guess I really will be celebrating my "Independence day."

up10ad · 06-30-2009, 09:08 AM

Hawk, sorry to hear that. I'm sure your will move on with a renewed spirit and I certainly wish you all the best.

Mike12000 · 06-30-2009, 09:21 AM

Hawk, I'm sorry to hear that. It sounds like you have a healthy attitude towards your troubles though. We really don't have much power to change anyone. And yet people change through the years. Under the circumstances, you're probably better off seperating now then working on the marriage for 5-10 years and then still getting divorced. Do you have children together? That sure makes things much less complicated if there aren't.

I'm wishing you all the best in what is usually a very tough, gut-wrenching transition. Stay strong and true to yourself, Hawk!

Hawk · 06-30-2009, 09:21 AM

Thanks Upload and Mike.

The really sad part is that this coming August will be 3 years. The problems seem to have started when we bought our house last July. Don't exactly understand why, but it is the focal point of where things started going south for us.
I can only speculate that the domestic lifestyle must have scared her. An Apartment must have meant flexibility, while the house signaled permanence. Whatever the case may be, I still love her to death. But like I said, I cannot be with someone that does not want to be with me. Who knows, maybe when i bring the paperwork by the reality of the situation will finally hit her.

yeah, and monkeys might fly out of my butt too...

psylichon · 06-30-2009, 09:29 AM

Always sad to see this happen, especially to a great person. I hope everything comes through for the best for you both...

gogoplata1980 · 06-30-2009, 09:30 AM

Sorry to hear this. I pray you the best in everything. Again, I'm very sorry for you.

chris · 06-30-2009, 09:44 AM

Sorry to hear the bad news. Keep your head up, stay positive and things will work out in the long run for you. You'll hear it a million times, but it will just take time. Surround yourself with friends and focus on doing things you enjoy....like paintball.

TarekElsakka · 06-30-2009, 10:01 AM

I'm terribly sorry to hear that. You're right though, don't stick to some one who doesn't want to be with you. Don't worry, it's not all over once when you get divorced, there are a lot of other single girls and women out there looking for relationships, that's if you're planning to get in one. Good luck man.

Hawk · 06-30-2009, 10:13 AM

Thanks everyone. I have a feeling that this is going to hit me like a ton of bricks in the next couple days. it seems surreal at the moment. I started this thread because I needed to talk about it. That in itself is one of the major disagreements (one of many) that she and I have. When i have a problem, I have no problem going to friends, even online ones, and talk about it. When she has a problem, she buries it and clams up as she believes it's no ones business but hers. That was actually what we were talking about when she said it was over. It's because when things first started getting ugly, I brought her father into it.

lady_bugz22 · 06-30-2009, 10:39 AM

Hawk- I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but you are right you can not change her & you deserve better if she's not willing to work things out.

When I was married to my ex & we were going through our divorce I always thought to myself I am miserable right now which will only be temporarily, but if I was to stay with him I would always be miserable.

I kept telling myself this & it would actually help me get through the days I thought I couldn't get through it.

Surround yourself with friends & family, keep busy, & if you feel you need it get counseling for yourself.